Authenticity seems to be something I keep coming back to as a person and business owner. I want to be someone relatable to all my clients, to have more of a connection to them other than I'm the one with the camera at your wedding. But I also want to share a little of my life, to just connect with a broader audience. So, I've decided to start Let's Chat Thursday's. Every Thursday or at least once a month I want to post something a little more personal than my current work or some exciting personal event that's happened in my life. Don't worry this won't be a ranting blog post, but more of a I'm a real person blog post. Today, I want to begin with sharing my story about becoming a new mom. I will have to admit, this may not be relatable to most of you, because you are still in the couple stage of life, but maybe one day you can look back and read this and find encouragement. Or maybe this will just be so you know where I'm at as a person outside of work.
I very anxiously awaited the birth of our first daughter, Olive. She was four days past her due date, but came into this world absolutely perfect. Well, she didn't arrive easily, (I definitely wouldn't call 36 hours of labor perfect nor easy), but she was healthy and thriving. The first week and half my husband and I seriously thought "this isn't that bad" she ate and slept like an angel.
Then day 10 hit.
Our sweet little angel started to show her true colors. Being a new mom I immediately called the doctor thinking something was wrong, because she would not stop crying.
Thankfully, there was nothing wrong with her. But the first few weeks of her life were filled with me searching for answers. I probably spent way to many hours on google and other blogs reading every article I could, hoping there would be some answer, any answer.
My sweet grandma sent us a book about babies, which did help a lot. I got in touch with a lactation consultant, cried out to other mom's and went to the doctor probably every other week thinking something else was wrong.
In the end Olive did have a tongue tie and was struggling to eat well, but a month later now she is still the same girl...crying a lot. At this point, I understand her a lot more and generally know why she is crying, but knowing doesn't always mean I'm able to remedy it. Even though I wish I could say one thing or another solved her crying we have just come to settle on the fact that she is a "high-needs" baby. Simple as that, she needs us a lot.
I am thankful though that even if it takes hours sometimes the crying does end, and she does eventually sleep, even just for a short period of time.
I had high thoughts for being a stay at home mom -working from home and out shooting when I have sessions/weddings. I thought, oh yes, my baby will sleep a lot especially at the beginning and I can jump right back into everything at 8 weeks. But here I find myself at 9 weeks and still barely having time to eat meals let a lone make it to do work. All because, this sweet girl of mine, needs me, and needs me a lot.
My husband and I are very independent people, so I find it very ironic God has given us a very needy baby. We are being humbled in a beautiful way, but it is still so bitter sweet.
So, if you find I am slower to respond to emails than I may have before or take longer than 2 weeks to edit photos, know its because I am loving my sweet little girl by being there for her above all else.